Chapter 9: The Lobster Quadrille
(Secret Love Affair - Alice in Wonderland Parody)
(Secret Love Affair - Alice in Wonderland Parody)
In the early hours of the morning as
the sky was turning purple, a dark figure in a hooded jacket and
skinny jeans walked along the cement embankment of the Han River.
Pink streaked the sky and reflected in shimmering blue water.
Overhead street lights lit the bridge, where a few vehicles were
crossing, although lights along the embankment path had turned off.
The figure found a place where a slanted buttress met tiered cement
blocks and sat down on the edge.
Taking off her backpack, she set it on
the ground, lowered herself to the step, and pulled the zipper. A
flash of light caught a laptop as it slid quietly down the buttress
and disappeared into the water with hardly a splash, followed a
moment later by a matching tablet. She zipped up her pack, looked
casually around, and stood up.
“Look here, look here, what is this?”
demanded a voice behind her. It was Kang, flanked by four policemen.
“This is cheap of you, Kang!” she
cried.
“Penal Code 241, Dumping in the Han
River,” intoned the Three of Clubs.
“You know how hard it is to dredge?”
the Five of Spades demanded. “That thing is only eight feet deep!”
“You'll have to come along,” added
Three.
Quite a crowd collected at the police
station; the duchess got a call and came to enjoy the show. A few
others were there, including Seon-jae. He tried out an excuse on the
officers. “It wasn't dumping. She had a lobster trap.”
“We didn't see any lobster trap.”
“Maybe it came loose and floated
off.”
“You can only catch carp and eel in
the Han.”
“That's what people eat,” Hye-won
put in eagerly, “but we weren't going to eat these. Haven't you
ever heard of a lobster quadrille?”
“You form a line along the shore,”
Seon-jae explained, (“Two lines,” put in Hye-won) “and advance
twice, with a lobster as a partner. Throw them out to sea-”
“Swim after them and turn a
somersault in the sea!”
“Change lobsters again, and come back
to land.”
“You can do it without lobsters, but
it is a very pretty dance,” ended Hye-won.
“All right, all right, enough of that
stuff.” The lizard indicated Seon-jae. “Tell me truthfully
regarding him. Are you perhaps in league with the griffin?”
“I'm not certain what you mean,” Hye-won replied, not looking up.
“Are you two inciting him to go
overseas?”
“We never banded together.” He
picked up a file and threw it, making her yelp.
“There, there, there. Please be
quiet,” said the Three of Clubs. “Mr. Kang, please describe in
detail what you saw.”
“Wait, whether I directly saw it or
not is not important here!”
“Are you saying this has nothing to
do with the illegal dumping of waste from a chocolate factory?”
“Chocolate factory?” asked
Seon-jae, startled.
“Here, one moment please,” Hye-won
interjected. “Can I call a lawyer?”
“Sure, go ahead,” said Three. She stood up to walk out, but the lizard grabbed her arm and jerked
her back into her chair.
“Do it here,” he ordered. “You
have an intention to flee!” He handed her the desk phone. She
called the Knave of Hearts, and no one objected when she talked to
him alone in the hall.
“Will you help me if I hand you over
those files you wanted?” she asked him.
“If the queen is on the list of
people to investigate, sure,” he returned. They shook hands and he
got the charges dropped.
“What's this?” objected the
duchess. “They're not going to jail? I thought this would be the
end of the Love Affair of the Century.”
That night the lizard was insistent.
“Just confess!” he yelled. “Then I will get a villa in Jeju
and a lifetime pass for the Namsan cable car!” When she refused, he
lashed out in frustration and knocked her cosmetics off the counter.
They didn't know until later that the
laptop had been fished out of the river.
